The Hornswoggler Family's Middle-Earth Names

I'm back from my business trip, but I'm feeling grumpy, depressed, and uninterested in blogging -- partly because of the recent travel & vacation, partly because of how much work is piling up at the office (this is the busy season), and partly because of one particular e-mail I just saw today. I do hope to bounce back in the next couple of days, but, right now, if I could be bothered to write, there would be nothing but an epic level of doom-mongering.

But, luckily, I still have some old bits and bobs stored away for times just like this.

I'm not sure which name-generator this came from, but it happened in July of 2003, so that site is probably long gone by now. I posted this on a thread on the Straight Dope Message Board, at a time when many of us there were checking to see what our names would be as hobbits and elves:

First I tried my real name --

As a hobbit: Mungo Sandybanks ("Yessir, Mr. Frodo, sir, I'll get those floors washed right now sir...")

As an elf: Valandil Nenharma ("Oh, Valinor is just too crowded this season, darling! Why don't we visit your charming cousins in Lorien instead?")

Then I used "G.B.H. Hornswoggler" (which was also my screen name there):

hobbit -- Togo Toadfoot of Frogmorton ("Whilst I was ankling my way to the Drones Club of Byswater, who should I spot but young Pongo Proudfoot! And he was in a bit of a jam, as usual, so I surged about to buck him up...")

elf -- Haldamir Miriel ("Yes, I fought in the Dwarf wars -- damn proud of it! Someone's got to keep those rock-eaters in their place, and it won't be the younger generation! Why, when I was in the Guards, my commander once said to me...")

my wife is either Daisy Sandybanks or Idril Nenharma, and the boys are Bulbo/Elrond and Pimpernel/Olwe.

Bulbo and Pimpernel?! What kind of a family am I running, here? And since when is "Bulbo" the hobbit translation of "Elrond," hm?

Reviewing the Mail: Week of 11/14

First comes the general disclaimer: these are the books that arrived in the mail last week. I intend to read many of them, but I haven't read any of them yet. (And, this week, I've barely even glanced at any of them.) So this is not a "review" in any real sense of the word: it's a collection of first thoughts and unformed prejudices about some books that I don't know much about. Please do not read too much into it.

Second is the specific disclaimer: I'm currently in San Francisco, twenty-five hundred miles away from this pile of books on my desk. I did scribble down the titles and authors before I ran off on this trip, but that's it. So this week's post, like last week's, will be a work in progress -- right now, there will be only that most minimal information, then (at some point) Amazon links and cover images will appear, and at some other point (perhaps earlier, perhaps later), comments on the items will also blossom.

Yes, it's a pretty useless post at this point. But what do you expect from a blogger, anyway?

(I will note that nearly all of these are manga this time around, with big packages from Yen Press and Tokyopop, and then two non-manga graphic novels at the end. It was not a good week, at least in my mailbox, for plain prose.)

Update: Well, it's now Saturday night, so if I don't update this post now, it'll be abandoned forever. So here's a quick once-over.

Yokaiden 2 by Nina Matsumoto -- I reviewed the first volume of this manga-style-and-format series by an American last year for ComicMix, and this is the inevitable follow-up. (It's from Del Rey Manga, and published this month.)

The next bunch are all from Tokyopop, and all are publishing in December:

Madness, Vol. 1 by Kairi Shimotsuki -- a SFnal yaoi series in which the violence and the overwrought emotions seem to be of equal importance. It looks a lot more boyish in its style and violence than the yaoi I've seen, making me wonder if it's more for tough girls or gay men.

.hack//Alcor by Amou Kanami and Izumibara Rena -- I gather that this is a side story from .hack (which I've never read), but the back-cover copy is deeply opaque, and I suspect this is not terribly new-reader friendly.

World of Warcraft: Death Knight, story by by Dan Jolley and art by Rocio Zucchi -- it's a tie-in to the popular online game, telling the backstory of the renegade death knight Thassarian -- and only you can tell if you know (or care) who Thassarian is, and only those who already know will care.

D.N.Angel, Vol. 13 by Yukiru Sugisaki -- Here in volume 13, "the time has come for Satoshi to reveal to Daisuke the history behind the Hikari/Niwa curse," sayeth the back cover. It's never too soon to explain a family curse (is what I always say), so I'm mildly unhappy that it took S. this long. But I have no idea who these people are, or what the curse entails, so I'll just purse my lips distractedly and move on.

This Ugly Yet Beautiful World, Vol. 1
D.N.Angel, Vol. 13 by Ashita Morimi -- Oddly, this is rated M (for mature) even though it seems to primarily be an adventure story for tween boys (and about tween boys). Well, I could be underestimating their ages -- this is manga, after all, where everyone either looks 12 or 137 -- but they're clearly school-aged boys. But there's nudity in here along with the young-eyes-friend art style -- and the back cover promises "explicit sexuality and fanservice," as well -- so this may be another example of How Japan Is Different. Since it's a beginning, I'm putting it on the pile to be read, so I hope to report on that Difference eventually.

Maria Holic, Vol. 2 by Minari Enou -- This one looks pretty weird -- maybe weird enough for me to read it. It seems to be a comedy about two roommates at a strict religious school for girls -- one lesbian and one cross-dressing boy. (And there's a good joke about the Virtual Boy on the first page.) The title doesn't make sense to me, but perhaps it becomes clear in context.

.hack//Legend of the Twilight: The Complete Collection omnibus by Rei Idumo and Tatsuya Hamazaki -- Again, I have to admit that I don't know anything about .hack. But this is an omnibus of a complete story, so I'll try to find time to look at it. It also says that it's suitable for teens, so I may get my older son's take on it (since he reads a lot of manga, and the getting-to-be-a-powerful-character-in-a-video-game-world plot will greatly appeal to him).

And this next batch -- most of the rest of this week's list, actually -- is all from Yen Press, also in December:

Yotsuba&!, Vol. 7 by Kiyohiko Azuma -- I reviewed the first volume here, and pondered a couple of later volumes in various places as well. The little girl at the center of the plot still seems too aggressively unknowledgable about everything, but I've come to believe that she's just meant to be an energetic, inquisitive kid, and I'll chalk the exaggeration to cultural differences. There's a decent-sized Yotsuba cult, who were depressed when ADV Manga punted on the series after the first five volumes.

Raiders, Vol. 1 by JinJun Park -- A Korean manwha that looks to take the usual somebody-else's-culture liberties with its subject matter in the aim of telling an exciting adventure story. But that many offend some (easily offended and overly stuffed) Westerners, since the maguffin here is the one and only Holy Grail (so is the title a sly Indiana Jones reference?), which eventually makes our young hero immortal and which also seems to have created a group of zombie-like "undead cannibals."

Pandora Hearts, Vol. 1 by Jun Mochizuki -- Well, there's a boy named Oz (perhaps the scion of a wealthy house) and a girl named Alice (who befriends him when he's thrown in the interdimensional prison the Abyss and who "is not what she seems," though we're not told what she or or what she seems), and the possibility of "crushing despair." Using my old rough-and-ready two-value theory of manga -- books about fighting things are for boys; ones about emotions are for girls -- I tentatively name thee shojo.

Ichiroh!, Vol. 2 by Mikage -- I reviewed the first volume of this cram-school comedy, so I'll direct you there for further details.

Pig Bride, Vol. 3 by KookHwa Huh and SuJim Kim -- Again, this is one where I reviewed the first book, so look there for more details of this fabulist Korean romance/adventure story.

Cynical Orange, Vol. 9 by Yun JiUn -- The final volume of a series I've never read but whose title has been a source of amusement to me for the past few years. It's more romance comics, presumably with a final happy ending this time.

Comic, Vol. 8 by Ha SiHyun -- A relationship Korean comic, set -- as I recall -- in the world of manwha artists. I haven't read any of them, I'm afraid.

Spice and Wolf, Vol. 1 by Isuna Hasekura -- This is a light novel, and is the first prose publication under the Yen imprint (unless I missed something.) It's illustrated by Jyuu Ayakura, and is a medieval story of an itinerant peddler -- the kind that only exists in fiction -- and the wolf goddess who befriends him. It does have a big "Volume 1" on the spine, so expect more of the same.

One Thousand and One Nights, Vol. 9 by Han SeungHee and Jeon JinSeok -- Another late book in a series I haven't read. This one seems to be Arabian Nights-inspired (though possibly futuristic) and romance-driven (with possibly a hint of yaoi).

Moon Boy, Vol. 7 by Lee YoungYou -- Yes, once again it's a late book in a series unknown to me, with a sea of unfamiliar names on the back cover. It's Korean, and -- as I recall from looking at previous volumes -- it's about the supernatural battle between "Foxes" and "Rabbits" over the Earth, and possibly other places.

Time and Again, Vol. 1 by JiUn Yun -- Two wandering exorcists travel Japan -- probably in some particular past era, but the back cover doesn't specify -- to ply their trade.

Azumanga Daioh Omnibus by Kiyohiko Azuma -- a massive volume collecting the entire 4-panel comedy series about a group of highschool friends. This was the first series -- well, the first one I heard of, and I believe the first to be translated into English -- of Azuma, the creator of Yotsuba&!. It's also pretty popular, from what I've seen.

And now we finally come out of the forests of manga and into the plains of Western comics...

The Year of Loving Dangerously by Ted Rall and Pablo G. Callejo -- In 1984, Ted Rall was evicted from his Columbia apartment, and found himself homeless, jobless, and at loose ends. This is the story of what happened next, drawn by Bluesman artist Callejo. (The focus, as you might guess from the title, is on the women Rall slept with, in large part to have a bed for the night. Ah, the '80s!) Loving Dangerously will be published in December by NBM.

Graphic Classics: Louisa May Alcott -- and last for this week is the latest in the Graphic Classics series, edited as always by Tom Pomplun. Alcott seems an odd choice for the series -- which has mostly focused on boy- and comic-shop-friendly writers like Twain, Poe, and Lovecraft -- but I'll take it as a sign that these books are being picked up by teachers and other markets outside the usual insular Wednesday-comics world. Some of the people with work in this one are Trina Robbins, Molly Crabapple, Mary Fleener, and Shary Flenniken (whom I haven't seen anything by in a decade -- and her Trots and Bonnie strip was amazingly wonderful). This one should be hitting retailers within the next couple of weeks.

For those of you who are obsessive, check back often for updates to this post. For the other 99.995% of the human race, next week should see me back on a normal schedule.
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Listening to: My First Earthquake - Meat Pies
via FoxyTunes

In Which I Post Just to Say, "What He Said"

I'd been saving this SF Signal post about "International Science Fiction Reshelving Day" -- coming up quickly on the calendar; it's next Wednesday -- because I wanted to rain scorn and bile on the idea.

But I don't need to, since the estimable Charles Tan has already done so.

So, to repeat: what Charles said. And in spades. It's a remarkably stupid idea on several levels, and not nearly as clever as it thinks it is.

Odds and Sods

Imprimus: I have just arrived in San Francisco (for the second time in two months) for the always-electrifying Business Valuation conference of the AICPA. (This one starts at 6:45 Monday and Tuesday, he said, shuddering visibly.) I expect to be chained to a booth for most of the forty-eight hours starting tomorrow morning, and then flying back to Newark the rest of Tuesday. So blogging may well be light or nonexistent. But, then, I say that a lot these days.

As a sidebar note, I'm expecting to show up at the SF in SF reading, which starts in a couple of hours -- wonder if I'll see anyone I know?

Secundus: It's been a long time since I read a novel and had to sit quietly afterward to let it sink in -- it's rare to find that level of involvement and power (particularly for a reader as demanding and opinionated as I am). But it happened on the flight over here. The bad news is that it's a twenty-three-year-old book that I should have read long before now: Ken Grimwood's Replay.

Tertius: No, actually, I think that's it for now.
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Now playing: The Rogers Sisters - Never Learn To Cry
via FoxyTunes

Reviewing the Mail: Week of 11/7

Sometime this week, there will be my usual "Reviewing the Mail" post in this space, covering whatever books came in last week. But it's not here yet, because I'm still at Walt Disney World, and have been during every mail delivery this week. So I have no idea what books are waiting for me, though I will get to them just as soon as I can.

For now, you just get the disclaimer: I haven't read any of these books yet, so this isn't really a "review." Some of them I might never read, because of lack of time or interest. But I want to give some attention to all of them, since not everyone has my tastes, and because publicists sent them to me hoping for a little publicity, and I can do that "little," if nothing else.

So, the books I saw the first week of November 2009 are:

Kitchen Princess: Search for the Angel Cake, a light novel by Miyuki Kobayashi with illustrations by Natsumi Ando, which is aparrently related to a manga series also called "Kitchen Princess." It's being published by Del Rey Manga, and was available November 10th.
Night Head: Genesis, Vol. 1 is the first volume (obviously) in a manga series about psychic brothers, tormented and alone because of their powers -- proving once again that Claremont-isms cross all cultural boundaries. Actually, I think this is the brand extension of something that was in another form first -- maybe a movie or TV show. It's credited as "Story by George Iida, Manga by You Higuri," and Del Rey will be popping it into stores on November 24th.

Also from Del Rey is Moyasimon 1: Tales of Agriculture, the first in another manga series by Masayuki Ishikama. It's another one of those stories about a guy going off to college who just wants to be normal -- but, this time, he can see germs with his naked eyes. (It looks like they might talk to him as well.) This looks weird, and I appreciate that. It will also be available November 24th.

The Sapphire Sirens is the latest book in John Zakour's detective-in-a-pulpy-future series -- the seventh overall, if I'm counting correctly. DAW publishes it in mass-market in December.

Also from DAW in December, and their obligatory original anthology for the month, is Spells of the City, edited by Jean Rabe and Martin H. Greenberg. There are eighteen new short urban fantasy stories from the usual DAW-anthology crowd, for those of you who want such a thing.

Also also from DAW in December is a new Valdemar anthology, Changing the World, edited by Mercedes Lackey (who else?). It has sixteen new stories, mostly by the people you'd expect, including one from Misty herself. I read nearly all of the Valdemar novels -- and enjoyed them, and even looked forward to a lot of them -- so no snarkiness from me this time.

The SFnal small press Fantastic Books sent me four of their recent publications:

First is Pennterra, a Judith Moffett novel about Quakers! In! Space! that is here copyrighted 2009, but which I vaguely remember was originally published in the early '90s, probably from Avon.

Secundus is Damien Broderick's The Judas Mandala, a 1982 novel that the back cover claims introduced the term "virtual reality." (Which I suppose is plausible.)

There's another Broderick novel, The Dreaming (originally published with ...Dragons at the end of the title), which has an "updated and revised" text. Oh, that's always a good sign....

Last from Fantastic is Wilson Roberts's The Serpent and the Hummingbird, a novel which appears to be new and an original publication and so about which I have little to say.

The Silver Skull is a novel of intrigue and spycraft in a cold-war-esque Elizabethan era (with Faerie here in the role of the dirty Commies, and our hero Will Swyfte as the James Bond of his time) by Mark Chadbourne; I'd already seen it in bound galleys and had it on the stack to read. Pyr is publishing it November 17th in trade paperback.

First Lord's Fury is the sixth of Jim Butcher's "Codex Alera" novels, of which I have, to date, read none. (I like his contemporary fantasies, but they haven't led me to want to read a secondary-world series by the same writer. It's very hard to interest me in a medievaloid secondary world these days, though -- I must admit.) Ace is publishing this in hardcover on November 24th.

And last for this week was the second collection of Jonathan Rosenberg's webcomic Goats -- The Corndog Imperative. Del Rey will publish this as a trade paperback on December 1st. (I reviewed the first Goats collection, Infinite Typewriters, for ComicMix this past summer, if you want an idea of what the strip is like. Or you could just go read the thing -- it is a webcomic, after all, and you're already on the web.)